Contemplation of Absence

Contemplation indeed. I don't really have much choice at this point as I don't really have a whole lot to be concerned about. Nope, not much at all really. Just me and my thoughts, keep an eye out for my girls, plan some training and adapt day by day. Running with my girl on the beach....hit the gym..... forms in the sand.... Kung Fu homework....while we're at it, let's reinstall Qi Gong for breakfast...everyday...hell yeah, life is good!

Hmmm I think I'm missing something...yup, indeed I am. There is my fellow candidates and a whole team busting they're asses and preparing for a moment of truth. I'm not there. I haven't been there before and I've held up my end of the bargain..... but this times different. I miss the connection with my teachers and being in the presence of my tightly knit bond with my fellow Sihings. Someone right now is filling in for me in the back of a Lion. I don't know who it is, but I can't thank you enough. I have a training partner that wants to insure all is good...like "Chuck the Chainsaw" good.. and yes folks, that's a big deal. But I'm not there, I'm not there to swing a set of oversized, short handled axes, in expected pristine fashion, like scary awesome pristine fashion. One may call this guilt, but it can't be, as guilt is useless and something I don't embrace. Guilt to me, on a personal level, is recognizing you failed to uphold a position of accountability on your own control and didn't follow through and choose to carry perceived assumptions that don't exist which become excuses. If you think about it, what's the point of beating yourself up and instilling self questioning on your abilities and an assumed judgement by others? Look at it for what it is in a black and white perspective. What happened? and why? How about just own your s$%t and own it, step up and make it right. You know you had something to do that went beyond just you and you know it will effect others. So does that mean you should never be apologetic for your short comings when it effects others just because you can admit it? Of course not. 

What it means is there is never an opportunity to not make things right. If you embrace the mindset of accountability and self discipline, and forge a high work ethic, your open short comings can always be turned over to awesome example, stuff that can be perceived as respectable follow through by those that count on you. We must realize full well that time never stops... things can always be set right. Believe in yourself and what you can do. You can't change what has passed, but you can step right into the action. Be in the moment regardless of current position and uphold your commitments. Just like now and where I am at. I'm not at the kwoon, I'm not there with my fellow candidates or my training partner, or the I Ho Chuan team. But I am doing my Kung Fu homework. I am working on my weapon form and I am working on areas of lion dancing. I am working on my writings and maintaining my conditioning. I've made arrangements before I left to hook up with my training partner upon my return to prepare and insure my techniques are up to "Chainsaw Chuck" standards, and roll into the I Ho Chuan expectation like I never left.

 Absence holds no relevance, nor it is an excuse to not uphold expectations. Kung Fu holds no boundaries or barriers and yes folks, it fits in your suitcase. Bottom line is I miss you all and I won't disappoint the team upon my return... because that's for them other guy's. See you at the Kwoon.