The Circle is Closing

Well here we are at the end of another year, man time flies. It has been a pretty good year overall though. I hit a lot of milestones in my training and created a whole pile of other stuff to work on and improve. Gotta love how it all works in a circle, even if at times it can be an oblong one.

As another year grows to completion, as does opportunity. Now is a chance to look back at what goals you set out to do, how you did or didn't reach them. Gaining knowledge and experience by overcoming and failing as you work towards your goals gives a base to build the next stage of your training. This knowledge both good and bad, can be carried forward and given an opportunity to either diminish or grow. Once you remove inefficiency or distractions you have now created some tools with serious potential and versatility. Sometimes the filtration doesn't work so well and needs attention before anything can start moving ahead. Other times it's like jet fuel and your gone. Obstacles are built to different and seemingly impossible heights and lengths, emotionally and physically challenging, as are bridges. The most important thing is advancement no matter how slow, just keep the steps going forward and embrace the determination of backwards sucks ass. There are those around that can help, be grateful for that and appreciate it. As this act in itself teaches self awareness to others in need and removes the self.

 The beginning of the year required a lot of work to get the wheels rolling, I came in heavy so to speak and perhaps some tools I never used before and others I forgot needed to be on the front lines, whether I liked it or not. I stuck to the plan this year as best I could and reached to those I needed to and accepted with respect, those who offered. I took on a difficult task with the correct frame of mind and maintained determination to see it through to the next level. Mostly because there was not going to be a next year. If I couldn't get my head on straight and attempt the rank of Black Belt to my absolute best, then I probably never will. This wasn't something I was just willing to throw away. So I stayed true to the best of my abilities and continue down the path. I have two strong Sihings to keep me company and help me see it through, and Sifu's that share their knowledge and offer support. A whole team of martial artists and a great school. Yeah I would have to say it's been a great Year.

Happy New Year everyone, see you next year.

Contemplation of Absence

Contemplation indeed. I don't really have much choice at this point as I don't really have a whole lot to be concerned about. Nope, not much at all really. Just me and my thoughts, keep an eye out for my girls, plan some training and adapt day by day. Running with my girl on the beach....hit the gym..... forms in the sand.... Kung Fu homework....while we're at it, let's reinstall Qi Gong for breakfast...everyday...hell yeah, life is good!

Hmmm I think I'm missing something...yup, indeed I am. There is my fellow candidates and a whole team busting they're asses and preparing for a moment of truth. I'm not there. I haven't been there before and I've held up my end of the bargain..... but this times different. I miss the connection with my teachers and being in the presence of my tightly knit bond with my fellow Sihings. Someone right now is filling in for me in the back of a Lion. I don't know who it is, but I can't thank you enough. I have a training partner that wants to insure all is good...like "Chuck the Chainsaw" good.. and yes folks, that's a big deal. But I'm not there, I'm not there to swing a set of oversized, short handled axes, in expected pristine fashion, like scary awesome pristine fashion. One may call this guilt, but it can't be, as guilt is useless and something I don't embrace. Guilt to me, on a personal level, is recognizing you failed to uphold a position of accountability on your own control and didn't follow through and choose to carry perceived assumptions that don't exist which become excuses. If you think about it, what's the point of beating yourself up and instilling self questioning on your abilities and an assumed judgement by others? Look at it for what it is in a black and white perspective. What happened? and why? How about just own your s$%t and own it, step up and make it right. You know you had something to do that went beyond just you and you know it will effect others. So does that mean you should never be apologetic for your short comings when it effects others just because you can admit it? Of course not. 

What it means is there is never an opportunity to not make things right. If you embrace the mindset of accountability and self discipline, and forge a high work ethic, your open short comings can always be turned over to awesome example, stuff that can be perceived as respectable follow through by those that count on you. We must realize full well that time never stops... things can always be set right. Believe in yourself and what you can do. You can't change what has passed, but you can step right into the action. Be in the moment regardless of current position and uphold your commitments. Just like now and where I am at. I'm not at the kwoon, I'm not there with my fellow candidates or my training partner, or the I Ho Chuan team. But I am doing my Kung Fu homework. I am working on my weapon form and I am working on areas of lion dancing. I am working on my writings and maintaining my conditioning. I've made arrangements before I left to hook up with my training partner upon my return to prepare and insure my techniques are up to "Chainsaw Chuck" standards, and roll into the I Ho Chuan expectation like I never left.

 Absence holds no relevance, nor it is an excuse to not uphold expectations. Kung Fu holds no boundaries or barriers and yes folks, it fits in your suitcase. Bottom line is I miss you all and I won't disappoint the team upon my return... because that's for them other guy's. See you at the Kwoon.

The Example of a True Elite

Some where along the way someone seems to have found the accelerator on the old time piece. Man times flying quick and there is still a ton of stuff to do by many and myself to prepare and show what a years worth of training looks like by this years I Ho Chuan class. All of that work should resonate quite clearly in each and everyone of us. When I think of how the I Ho Chuan class is viewed,  by dedicating a year to mastery and usually on the front lines of pretty much all of the Kwoon events, I think of the I Ho Chuan as the elite in the school. Some people don't like the term elite for whatever reason, but whatever it is it's theirs and that's their business. I think of elite as a balanced perspective or perhaps an accurate description of a expectation of a goal with never ending results led by example and respect to tradition.

 My personal perspective of the word elite is a term used to describe hard work, discipline, commitment, drive and a relentless vision that never sees' an end or an arrival. One who continually never forgets where they came from and practices continued respect to the very place or person that provided them with the gift of opportunity, knowledge, and acceptance through trustworthy obligation.  A practicing elite is a highly influential person of example minus the over inflated ego that tends to become the primary fuel in some along with the self proclaimed and self justified importance that is the complete opposite of what they are actually supposed to be. Forgetting where they came from, and just what provided the comfort of their existance along with insecurities and closed minded personalities have no place here. Fear of themselves and the belief that their opinions and views should be embraced by others with no solid base or action is more fitting in this case. Instead an elite powers themselves with non judgemental  character and obvious humility which becomes welcoming and attractive to others. It's a passion and determination for perfection and efficiency in doing what they believe in and are physically pursuing that sends ripples of inspiration to others that awaken the creativity and the free thinking that in turn awakens goals and dreams to come alive in others.

An elite is not afraid to hit the dirt, bleed, expel emotions that may be unnecessary at the time but in turn become inner strength to pursue the challenge and succeed. Good enough is a term seldom, if ever used by anybody that wants to take themselves above and beyond what they ever thought possible and inspire others to do the same. I also believe this type of person is not concerned to face their struggles and show how to overcome them out in the open. That to me is balanced courage and another example that others can embrace. I do my best to try work towards becoming this type of person and I always look towards those I respect or follow their example to push myself and work towards being an elite martial artist. I'm very grateful that I am allowed to train in a traditional school and earn the gift of knowledge of a traditional art. There's not much left out there that hasn't been watered down or has forgotten tradition or actually promotes it. Because that's hard or it takes too much time or holds no value to the ignorant that forgets what made them in the first place.  A place that provides opportunity and inspiration, promotes hard work and discipline, provides an opportunity to show those around us what being awesome and what it takes to awaken your inner being and self expression. A place that inspires you to become your own elite.

Embracing the Aftermath

It's never easy to describe in fine detail or provide a universal comprehension to others on a personal  journey or experience that changes your direction in life in the setting of past, present, and future. One that has made such a deep impact and although labouring, rewarding beyond what you ever thought possible. Journeys of this type are never easy, there is no short cut, there is no easy way, and there is no app for that. Everyones perceptions are unique and we all kind of speak our own languages. So I will do my best to tell you about a day, (in short form), that had a very profound and permanent impact on me. This day where it all seemed right, a day where I was ready to take on the world and win. This day, where I was running on full determination, narrowed focus, and prepared to push my body, mind, and spirit to the point of destruction if needed. A time where emotions were not part of the component. A day where I opened it all up and showed what I was made of, the day I showed heart.....the day I graded for the rank of Black Belt..... November 19, 2016.

I woke up Saturday morning with the first feeling of content until I fully awakened and stood up to get out of bed. Dizzy and not feeling right. Perfect, now I'm sick. Whatever, let's go princess. I had breakfast, mentally prepared, and continued to hydrate, then, more mental prepare. Reminiscing and then quickly removing those memories from my thoughts. That was then, this is now.

 Walking into the Kwoon at times can be incredibly intimidating, this was one of those times. Changed, hydrated, cleared my thoughts and was ready to grade. I was invited in and assessed the environment and the people in it. Calmed the mind and headed over to my fellow candidates. I wonder how they are doing? It doesn't matter, although we are each on our own journey, we're together and our shared vision will create the setting and work towards the final outcome. There is my training partner, I wonder how he's doing? Once again, it doesn't matter at this point. I believe we are ready, we worked hard and the goal is the same. To succeed just as we planned. I am confident.

The grading began and I pushed myself as hard as I could. All my years of training were brought to the table and the focus was steel. Sweat burning the eyes, moments of wanting to pass out, muscles burning beyond belief. I was not giving up or relaxing for nothing, I will be carried out on a stretcher before I yield. I felt good and although tired and numb at times, I felt strong and ready for more. Mentally the goal was clear and the focus narrowed on all that was required. I felt as though my thoughts were on a hair trigger, but the response relaxed and controlled. Maintaining calm and ejecting immediately what was unwanted. The mind must run clean. At times the focus was so narrow, I was the only one in the room and the task at hand. I was ready for this, even though you have no idea really what your ready for.  A brisk run and the test was complete.

Tired and exhausted at the end of it all, not thinking I had anything left and staying awake on the drive home was the question. I began to re-energize once again. The day and it's effect on me mentally and physically were amazing. I had such internal energy... I can't even explain it or where it came from. I got home and thought I could sleep. I couldn't until well past 12:30 and even then I tossed and turned all night and wide awake at 6:30 a.m. I just don't know, but what a pump man!

Once again reflecting on the previous day, I thought of everyone there. My fellow candidates that did awesome and how I am not only proud of them, but I'm proud to know them and what they accomplished. My very first Sifu was there that inspired me to continue, along with my second that trained me through a belt completion and two more promotions. All Sifus' that remained all had a huge impact on my training and were a major component of what took place on my behalf. My training partner performed extremely well and unconditionally sacrificed his time to help me put my mental creativity to physical reality. For all of this I am grateful and it made me feel like I gave something back to those that have given me so much by showing up and attempting to grade.  I did my best and I gave it my all. I prepared and was ready to grade and in the process I busted through internal walls and never allowed my focus to be diverted.  I put my heart into it. I did it, I graded for the rank of Black Belt. Still a long ways to go yet, but as a result of reaching this point, my life has changed. See you at the Kwoon.

Calming the Mind

Well it's the night before grading and all I'm really doing at this point is working on calming my mind. There's not much else that can be done at this point physically that will make anything involving my Kung Fu change or improve drastically, to attempt this or even consider this would be just plain stupid. No, it's my minds turn to prepare and it runs everything.

I am stratigizing and preparing my plan for the day without really considering or seeing the outcome. Honestly at this point it's irrelevant, the mind needs to be clean and sharp without clutter or extra baggage, streamlined and running clean without any unnecessary emotional out bursts. Emotions aren't invited until after all is said and done, then they can do whatever they; like during a revisit of a path that was just cut, and just what it took to get to this point perhaps. Either way, each and every task must be performed to the best of ones abilities, good or bad, and let go, move to the next. That's where my thoughts are at the moment.

 All that was brought forward to this date needs to be compartmentalized (not sure if this is a word...but it is today) and on standby to be dispatched at the drop of a hat and performed with the heart and focus of a Black Belt. Determination and pushing hard to the destiny must be key with a powerful mind in the drivers seat. As far as I can tell I think everything is ready or it's going to be as ready as it's going to be anyway. I am very excited for tomorrow and look forward to seeing and being tested and observed by some of the most influential individuals in the school, our Sifu's. I hope to do them and the school proud.

The Inner Workings of Mending a Relationship

As one of our many I Ho Chuan requirements this one has always been a tough one to sort. Not in relation to me being able to admit to my wrong doings or over reactions, or even full on anger towards others. I can usually take care of that during or a short time later. I have made the point of calling people out of the blue and stating my position and owning my accountability to the misunderstanding just from a deep reflection of how I have arrived at the current point in my life and just how I got there by looking back. I guess sometimes I go on a soul cleanse to try to insure I have not left bad feelings or a negative impression on people. I know that is literally impossible but that doesn't mean we shouldn't try. As the individual and others change and mature or evolve if you will, so does our view points and judgements. I'm really glad and grateful to the influences I have had and the acquaintances I have made over the years to help me become a better person and reach others with respect and unconditional understanding.

But it hasn't, and still doesn't, always work this way. There are some that I chose to distance myself from and blow that bridge up for good and for good reason, I can't trust them ever again. I have questioned my instincts and learned the hard way as to why that mechanism is in us in the first place. No, the toughest thing for me is to sometimes forgive and relax my firm stance on certain views or beliefs if someone has intentionally wronged me or someone close to me. Especially if the trust is broken, it's next to impossible for me to forgive at this point. It's also very tough sometimes to look at yourself and see where you contributed and be accountable to it. Unless I am extremely over whelmed, to the point where I can't balance the simplest factors of said situation or remain rational, I don't tend to hold onto anger that long. I expel it as quickly as I can and toss invaluable energy and keep the lessons as tools to improve my ability to see the balance in all situations and differences with others.

So I guess you really have to look at it for what it is and what value is this relationship in general. What if the person holds no value or use in your life and is nothing more than a hindrance or a problem magnet that spreads not only to you but those close to you....is it really worth it to mend? How about see you later as in I hope to never see you later! Then what? With some of these types of people I have tried hard to see the good as there is good in everyone. Sometimes they just don't know it or see it. So do you swallow your pride and bend your beliefs, make the sacrifice and practice humility in order to help facilitate this in this person or do you follow your instincts and try to achieve a less harmless balance, distance yourself, and hope something runs them over....slowly..... twice..... like a road packer! It's really sacrifice and leaves you vulnerable, but in most cases then not we tend to roll the dice and practice forgiveness. I'm not so good at this, once your gone, you stay gone. But I'm getting better.... it just takes time and practice and self discovery.

What if there is more to the story than you actually know. What if this person that wronged you wasn't really them in the first place? What if there was a growing mental problem, or alcohol/substance abuse, maybe domestic or sexual abuse?  What if this person doesn't know how to express themselves properly and was really asking you for help? What if the wrong doing was just a way to gain your attention in the first place because you haven't been keeping up with your end of the relationship or have just been flat out neglecting them in favour of your own self interests? Maybe the problem is you and your over inflated ego, or your own aforementioned issues that you are not taking ownership on and refuse to do something about it. What if it was you yammering ignorance about someone else that made them feel terrible about themselves or question just who they socialize with. People in general like to put their own s^%t on others and judge and ridicule in order to take the focus off of themselves and then shut that same person out in order to feel better about themselves or if they are challenged on what they firmly believe is right, even if it's unfounded BS. I think in one way or another we are all guilty of this.

So you can see there is a lot to repairing a relationship in my opinion. Yes, there is probably a lot of overkill here and way too much thinking going on maybe. But you can't help but ask, What the hell happened in the first place and why? I have repaired broken or damaged relationships in the past and looked at a few of these points as tools or much needed questions before moving forward but not so much to this degree. I can honestly say though since I have been training in Kung Fu over the years my ability to read people has been significantly enhanced as has my ability to see both sides of the situation. But the best part is the desire to not wrong others in the first place. Kung Fu has helped me leave the ego out of the equation for the most part. I'm not perfect though, not even close. But I am sure trying to be a better person to those close to me and I do want to hold onto those that I have wronged or have been wronged by admitting to my short comings, holding others accountable in a mutual respect, and be the example of humility for my family and school. Sometimes that's not so easy but Kung Fu and it's vast range of knowledge and discipline sure helps with the perspective and balance we all need. See you at the Kwoon.

From a Tree Trunk to Gumby

Over the last while I have learned a lot more about my 5 techniques and how you must take into consideration each individuals body mechanics and just how they react. Height, weight, stiff, excessively flexible, strong, weak, fast, slow, focused aggression or spastic, angry, scared, trained or street fighter etc. All of things are and should be a consideration but it's not like you are able to ask an attacker to fill out a questionnaire or tell him, "No you don't match the requirements to my techniques so you'll have to fight someone else...have a nice day!" It just doesn't work like that.

Your techniques must not only be universal, but adaptable as well. Not to mention considerations or alterations on the fly and split second execution must be a part of it as well. In your mind you picture and practice the form. Form is the path, application is the commitment, and the intensity is just how far you are willing to take the commitment or the actual end result. I have practiced my personal techniques with a variety of body types, but the latest has been mostly with one type, taller, slim, fairly flexible, and I started to feel quite good about them until I worked on them with two levels of extreme on the weight/flexibility spectrum. For example on one technique the individual was heavier and less flexible, so it almost didn't work at all. I had to alter the initial part of the technique to work with the extra weight and manipulate the locks or alter my own and his body positioning in order for anything to be effective and have the ability to move the extra mass were I needed it to be and what I had to do in order to insure they landed in the position required to complete the technique. Without going into a long worded visualization of it all, I ended up sweeping only one leg as opposed to two and changed the initial lock in order to force the individual into the required position to complete the technique.

The other individual was like working with a light piece of rubber, very difficult to lock, so you really had to look for body reaction as opposed to taking the training partners word for it. I found accuracy was very important when working with someone that isn't easy to lock. You have to really get into that deep fulcrum point of the joint or the lock is next to impossible. This can be very difficult when they are a light person as well because you can't really use their mass to assist you in taking the individual off center or directing them to a desired position. You have to be fast and use more than one joint for manipulation. For example I would try to lock the wrist in such a position that the elbow would come into play along with the shoulder, think of twisting a towel. It may take more to your technique to have any kind of effectiveness with this type of person but I think the intial contact should be the starting point.

 There are many factors to consider but I feel an eye for detail is the most essential in order not to hurt somebody very badly or unintentionally that you are training with, but also to troubleshoot the technique and make it universally effective. I have learned a lot this last while and obviously much more to learn but I think with this gained experience I can have the confidence and assurance that if I ever had too, my techniques will protect me and disable an attacker and there are options available that must be considered when applying them and to what extent. See you at the Kwoon.

Tiger Challenge 2016

Amazing, inspiring, and extraordinary with a heart beat. Those are the words that come to mind when I reminisce on what I witnessed yesterday. From kids to adults the display of courage, skillset and hard work was just awesome. The amount of children in attendance was incredible as was the mindset and leadership of our instructors and their obvious ability to influence a positive encouragement to push yourself and doing your best is the goal. Seeing all of this was definitely a look into the future of our school and the standard that is to be expected. I think overall the results speak for themselves.

The hard work and discipline of all the Que belts as they prepared and competed in the tournament was way cool. From hand forms, to weapons, to fight choreography, both point and continuous sparring was just amazing. It takes a lot of courage to get up in front of everyone and perform or take on a challenge publicly and from what I seen from the students as a whole was just awesome. Kudos to all of the students and the efforts of our instructors.

My fellow candidates did so awesome at everything they did. I feel so proud and fortunate to train with these two highly skilled martial artists. They never cease to inspire me and keep me honest. Well done Sihings!

The Tiger Challenge also gives the students an opportunity to watch the Black Belts compete and perform and it was awesome. Having the privilege to witness that much skill and advancement was very inspirational. They all did so awesome I would need a whole page just to explain what I took away from it. But some of the more memorable parts was Sifu Reiger's unique signature on Loa Gar, Sifu Vanderham's performance of a form I dont know how to spell, (so I'm not going to try) and Sifu Rybak performing snake was awesome. I honestly don't know if I could ever move like that, but there will come a day where I will have too. Seeing these two different styles was interesting and an exciting look ahead as to what the future holds once a student receives the rank of Black Belt. Sifu Becketts Horse whip was amazing, the intensity in the eyes and definition of the form was very cool, Sifu M Becketts musical sword form was really incredible and she performed extremely well. I really enjoyed the unique Bench of Death form by Sifu Lindstrom. His form shows a huge level of creativity and is a good reminder that anything is a weapon.
As for my own experience, I could have done much better and to me in my mind, it was somewhat of a disaster. Nonetheless, it was a great day and I'm glad I was fortunate to be a part of it. My performance anxiety was next to nothing so that shows an area of growth. Looking forward to next year for sure as it will be on another level. So much to look forward too.

One last note a big hats off to all those that were the back bone of it all. From Sifu Csillag and others that organized and laid out the tournament, to all of the Sifu's that judgded the events, to Sifu Dennis pounding out the numbers and tracking the overall tournament and to all the volunteers that made it all happen, thank you very much. Your time and effort are very much appreciated by us all.

The Mental Approach

This last little while has had it's moments of testing true grit if you will, not only from a physical stand point but a mental as well. I firmly believe if you let the brain run you and not you run your brain the simplest things can become long division using the alphabet instead of numbers. The mind is the king of instilling doubt and fear. If you don't declutter the mind and always approach things with the what if syndrome, then you just let it destroy your advancement and impair your focus. Don't get me wrong I'm no expert at this but I can say this much, the skies the limit unless you fear yourself and what you can do. I believe in myself and what I can do because I have made goals and saw them through regardless of the circumstances.

 My year from the beginning to present has been under my control when it comes to approaching Kung Fu. I was recently going over what's left to sort out or polish and once I ran through the list, here came the mind messing with stuff from several angles. This isn't good enough, that's not good enough, are you sure you know this to Black Belt standards, are you sure you approached this year with the proper discipline and approach? Do you honestly believe you can pass the physical requirement to the standard that is expected of you? Are you going to just waste everyones' time once again? What if this and what if that? You know what mind? How about you take a flying leap into a tree shredder! Beat it!

Yes, I have had some drawbacks lately. Starting from the top, my hips are slowly loosening up but much slower than expected. Oh well, move forward and stay on the path. I felt off a few weeks ago and had a pretty good idea of what was happening, my prescription was once again having no effect. Now this really sucks because energy levels fall and me not accepting it and pushing through is not good for me or my longevity. Okay, blood test and now the dosage is doubled to .125 mg. Holy #@$% right! Hopefully this keeps my internal balance levelled out because when this stuff goes south, it not only effects me physically, but messes with my wiring as well. I really can't afford this right now but as far as I can tell, I should be okay. My knee is feeling much better as is my back so this is great. Lastly I caught one heck of a cold/flu type thing that really knocked the crap right of me and I'm just coming around now. I thought maybe I could sweat it out and kill it off with a fitness class and black belt test. Umm no, there were times when I asked myself, " Who's messing with the lights and why do I need to grab onto something?" I didn't make it through the test but I did do most of it. This was a moment where I let the mind fool me and give me bad advice. I should've stayed home and rested, but instead I listened to my stubborn side and pushed myself too much. Now this was not only really dumb, but really irresponsible on my behalf. It just became worse and I lost almost a week of valuable training time. I brought a sickness into the kwoon and was coughing and hacking relentlessly, working in close proximity of others that really can't afford any down time either or don't need to be sick as a result of my drive to push through type selfishness. So to those at the Kwoon on Saturday, I appologize and thanks for not hanging a beating on me.

Alright so this journal entry is super long and maybe a little bit stupid and perhaps has put a few of you to sleep. So I'll close it off with I guess the whole point and what it all means. I never let my mind distract me and when it got cute, I decluttered and prioritized. I stayed true to my path and my destination regardless of the drawbacks, I didn't fall into all or nothing mode and I've kept the three C's intact through it all. Now that in itself is an awesome accomplishment for me because a questionable approach and doubt has been mostly defeated and my passion for Kung Fu is once again mine. I have paced back and forth at the foot of this mountain far too long and embraced distraction as acceptable reasoning as to why I have not advanced. I cannot wait to achieve the rank of Black Belt and advance my skill and training and if I stay in the drivers seat of my mind, the possibilities are endless. See you at the Kwoon.

Hips, Knees, and Self Imposed Vulnerbilities

Training in Kung Fu is always a good learning experience when it comes to listening and learning about our bodies. I guess that's why Kung Fu provides such a vast and excellent opportunity for knowledge and adaptability. When something is going wrong or you are limited in your abilities due to and injury or lack a balanced discipline, as in my case stretching and changing things up a bit,  Kung Fu will prompt you to heal and educate yourself about your body and source information from other martial artists.

Case in point, some little bastard goblins have snuck into my hips and welded them together.... okay not really. I have been having trouble with my hips lately. Not pain, but lack of flexibilty and they seemed to be getting worse. I have been thrown off balance during forms and kicks just at belt level. When practing some kicks last week in Sihing class, like cross stepping behind and throwing a High Rising kick I just about drove my face into the mats. As funny as that may have been, it would have ultimately sucked. When I move into a horse stance, rather than sitting in the horse stance with a straight back, I am hunched over and using my legs which makes your legs burn out way faster and also burns up your energy.

So what do I have to do here to aleviate this issue. Well for starters ask those around you that train, so I did and in doing so I was given some stretches to do and some good insight on another area that may be contributing to this. My IT band. That actually made a lot of sense and may perhaps explain why I have so much trouble lately opening up the chest during forms. With this all in mind and all of the cross stepping we did from both leads during Sihing class my hips felt a lot better and have lossened up a bit. I have been doing Qi Gong lately and finding the snake to be very helpful in this area as well. Horse stances and open X stances in motion seem to have helped as well.  I think ultimately though what needs to happen is I may designate Sundays to a full day of stretching both dynamically and static. A few minutes here and there after classes is definately going to help, but I think with the amount of training that needs to be ramped up a full day of more stretching than taxing may help quite a bit. I guess we'll see.

I fell asleep unintentionally in a chair last week and awoke to a really bad cramp in my knee, like the kind of cramp you feel in your neck when you think it was okay to sleep with your ear touching your shoulder and your head jammed between the cushion and the arm rest... yah that kind of cramp. I'm not quite sure what happened but it took me a good minute or more to adjust my leg. It seems I fell asleep with my legs crossed and when the weight of the other one resting on my knee, and my muscles relaxed it did something. I'm not sure what but either way it hurts. There's no bruising at all so I don't think it's a ruptured blood vessel and I don't think it is mechanical, as there is no grinding or shoots of pain, but there is a steady pull in the muscle that gets sharper as I kneel down on the inside of knee but it does subside. I don't know it's weird. So I gave it a good solid rest on Saturday with heat and ice and good old tiger balm. It feels better today but still sends signals from the same origin but now a little different frequency. I kept mobile all day and worked it a little at a time but it seems the same. Little more heat and tiger balm and see how things are in the morning.

One last note to touch on is my punches, I have discovered that for some reason I think it is okay to over extend the arm which leaves my elbow extremely vulnerable. Not cool at all. I think what may have happened is I am improving on keeping the arm relaxed until the point of rotation and contact. I'm not sure completely but I noticed my when practicing some techniques with others I feel it in the elbow. This is not good and must be fixed sooner than later. I also noticed this on the back fist as well, another technique applied incorrectly but that came as a fairly easy fix. I was swinging the back fist from the chest using both arms and opening the chest but failing to lead with the elbow and rolling out the technique. This was happening more on the left arm than the right which was mentioned before about a balanced body. Nonetheless it would not take much to blow out your own elbow by throwing a back fist with full power and bad technique. Another bad habit that must be fixed. Well I think that about covers it for now. See you at the kwoon.

So definately a few things to work on here and something else to report on. We'll see how things are in a week. See you at the Kwoon.

The Other Side

Grading is coming up soon and survival of the day is paramount. You really have to be ready for anything, which is difficult when you really don't know whats coming except what you are supposed to know. Yah I know...what!?!? Keep reading and hopefully that handful of mud I just tossed into your eyes dissipates.

When practicing lately I have been practicing most techniques and combinations from the curriculum all from the same lead. I have been practicing my kicks for grading from a horse stance and making progress there as well. Sounds normal but there is just one thing to keep in mind. Injuries that come out of nowhere and they always do. So under that point, what happens if I injure an arm, shoulder, knee, back, or whatever. Have I trained my body enough to make drastic changes, such as switching leads or stances on the fly? Would I be able to perform a technique from the opposite lead and still perform with proper technique, effectiveness, and intensity. Am I able to switch to a Bow stance and still get in the amount of kicks needed to pass with the proper speed and technique? What about outside of grading, like real life applications and you lose the ability to apply your Kung Fu because you haven't trained the other side of your body?

This is something that should apply to all martial artists and their training. Now I'm not saying that you should train ambidextrous or your completely useless, but you should definitely be able to apply your techniques from both sides of your body. I'm kind of fortunate this way as earlier in our training we were encouraged to try techniques from both leads as I advanced through my que belts. It wasn't overly emphasized, but it was there and I haven't forgotten that.... except as of late. I have been working mostly from one lead and I could tell immediately when I ran through a few combinations and techniques from the opposite lead. It wasn't good. Then I thought back to when was the last time I ran through combinations from both leads.... about 3 months or better.

So the next little while I am going to run through some combos from both leads and practice my kicks from a Bow stance. Maybe this will help to improve some of my kick issues.  Nothing too extreme as there is much to be worked on and I have a solid base to work from but I hope in doing so I can add that confidence knowing that I have a plan and I am able to adapt on the fly. I think this practice would help my forms, kicks, stance transitions, and build a better balance in my muscle groups.  Time will tell I guess but options are a good thing! See you at the Kwoon.

Kicks, Bad Guy's and So Much More

Let's start with kicks, like the roundhouse in particular. I have been throwing this kick wrong like forever. Instead of executing the kick from the knee down, I have this whip thing going on which stems from throwing countless roundhouses with a fake and in this process turning into a Dragons whip kind of thing, like whipping a wet towel. This becomes especially evident once my legs begin to feel fatigue. It doesn't really matter if they are thrown from a Bow stance or a Horse stance, the result becomes the same and many things are affected. Things like the three point position for example. It becomes useless and effects the speed of the kick and my balance. Where you can really see this effect and where I can feel it is from the horse stance. Recovery and stability are heavily jeopardized and by incorporating the thigh into the execution prevents me from pushing the hip out and removes the three point alignment that is very critical. This also disrupts overall timing as well. But what becomes most detrimental at this point, is speed. The roundhouse kick should be lightning quick, even with all of the mechanics involved, it is more less a jab as opposed to a devastating kick such as a cut kick or Dragons whip for example. So in order to try to remedy this impairment I am going to adapt a practice by Bill "super foot " Wallace. Hundreds upon hundreds of reps from the crane position. With this I will be working several areas such as crane stance height, stance stability, proper execution, and speed. This will also work well for dynamic stretching and endurance, as well as highly efficient corrective training. At the moment and with the time limitations I have put myself in, I think this should approach should put me where I need to be come November and beyond.

Now the bad guy's. In other words my 5 personal techniques. Two weeks ago I managed to develop a new technique at open training which now gives me a solid 5. I like this technique and how it just kind of came together on the fly with Mr. Duncan. Aside from creating flow and leaving the blunt force trauma out of the equation, I'm pretty excited about this one. I also manged to redefine my disarmament technique. An earlier version lacked flow and too many direction changes. The newer version continues in one direction and removes a lot of unnecessary techniques. There is a risk of the firearm going off but if the technique is applied correctly and continued throughout, the risk becomes very low as the firearm is rendered useless, just like my attackers hand! (Insert evil laugh here) I will seek further consultation from the Sifu that taught us this technique to be sure. After going over the technique on my own a few times I have found a good group of one-handed finishing techniques that will be highly effective. The only thing I am struggling with is to do the spock thing with my hands to gouge out the eyes effectively and not break my fingers.... awesome right!

Now onto so much more. Conditioning, curriculum, memorization, hand forms, weapon forms, and through it all maintaining the three C's. Sounds like a lot, and it is of course. But my minds in the right place at the moment. I'm calm and at peace... well for the most part anyway, I still tend to get fired up about somethings but that's the balance we need in order to become stronger mentally and improve our adaptability through wide vision as opposed to seeing discovery through a pin hole in a wall. I am slowly beginning to understand a deeper comprehension of Kung Fu and it's mechanics. The softer and harder concepts and when to apply are starting to make sense. I am no where near a solid understanding but I guess maybe I'm just a slow learner. See you at the Kwoon.

Improvements and Reminders

So I had the opportunity yesterday to work on a couple of my own techniques. Keeping in mind what I have learned the last while about being grounded, disruption of the six harmonies and applying circular energy and using your attackers momentum and energy as opposed to all of your own. I did my best of attempting to be mindful of all of these factors and I honestly believe I made some really good progress. I can't speak for Mr. Duncan or how he felt after it all, but I could tell immediately when things were just raw power and when the technique was beginning to awaken. After numerous repetitions, I was beginning to feel less impact and more of a deflection and interception, smoother flow, and managing to turn my attacker 180 degrees effortlessly and by the time we were on the ground, the lock was already applied and my attacker pinned and I felt completely grounded. In my mind I was excited to notice that the "wedge" was already there as well. This was very exciting that this was all through the actual technique as opposed to forcing them around with my own energy, and then trying to find and apply the lock, and then insuring there was a wedge and I was grounded. With this discovery it was very easy to know if the application was being powered through or technical application was on track and that's just cool. I also tweeked one of my other techniques but left that where it's at for the moment. I want to concentrate on one at at time and have them technically sound before I begin to practice them all at once. By this time I will have my attacker come at me at random, I won't know for the most part which one I will need to apply and from which direction they will be coming from. I feel with this approach my personal techniques will be highly effective and I will evolve that much further as a martial artist. Good stuff indeed.

I really took to heart what Sifu Brinker had to say yesterday, I love it when Sifu doesn't sugar coat things and just tells it like it is. His words made me really take a look at myself and my position as a martial artist. Am I just doing this as a hobby or is this truly part of me. Do I want to be a Grand Master some day or just some mediocre wanna be that consistently finds excuses and justifications on why I can't be or shouldn't be. I hate that word can't, but somewhere along the way I felt the need to tolerate it.  Am I actually applying myself as a true hardcore Kung Fu student, or am I just dicking around, helping water down something that is pure, something that is powerful and something that is one of the few things left that hasn't been messed with  and is allowed to be and what is meant to stay as traditional. Traditional practices require hard work and commitment. So I had to ask myself yesterday, are you committed? Is it suddenly okay to relax your values and morals that you supposedly live by? Is it now okay to break your word by self justified excuses? I kind of felt ashamed but positively motivated and inspired to change things up, pour on the potency and practice my Kung Fu with a traditional mindset. This is how I deciphered his words and this is how I perceived them. Keep in mind everyones' perceptions are different and it's what you take away and how you apply these perceptions that either result in motivation or just another excuse on why you can't or something you can blame to deflect accountability from yourself,  it just that simple. It was all very inspirational and I'm more than grateful I was there to hear Sifu's words. It's not a rant or a personal attack, it was a door opening, it was a positive message, and it was a good healthy reminder to not be mediocre, but be a Master and apply mastery. Thank you Sifu.

Turning it up a notch or 600

Time is flying way too fast but that's nothing new. So many things left to do and complete in regards to training. My conditioning has declined a bit, form reps are not as high as they should be, a couple of assignments are incomplete, and I have forgotten some of the curriculum already. I have wandered off my discipline and training path again and allowed myself to become distracted. Just like everyone else I'm sure, summer is a difficult time for me to focus on a few things. Nope, it has to be several things going on at once and all are either imperative or require full attention which completely messes up the general mindset of prioritization. I can honestly say, yes, I am insane. Doing the same things, making the same mistakes over and over again expecting different results. But what if the perspective is changed? What if the vision has more clarity, and what if the definition of it all has a deeper meaning and an advanced understanding that leaves you thinking and inspired to push yourself beyond the levels you thought you may never surpass? If that's the case then I don't think it's a waste and I don't think all hope is lost. Things just need to be cranked up. I chose to go at it this year in an incremental fashion and yes that has been very difficult for me. But as I look at my training overall, I am behind in several aspects and somethings I haven't even looked at. So what am I going to do about it. Cry, become frustrated, freak out and do a whole bunch of things that are going to be just done for the sake of doing them below standard. Am I going to lie about it? Pretend that nothing is wrong and all is good. You can't do that in Kung Fu. The minute you are on the mats, in a few simple moves, you basically have just spilled your guts with out saying a single word. Am I prepared and able to bring everything up to speed and beyond? Hell yeah and then some.

So what am I going to do about it. Stay positive, Review my goals and my destiny daily and train like a freakin demon straight through from this point and beyond Chinese New Year. Maintain my engagement by consulting those I need too, and that could be anyone in the kwoon. Remain in close contact with my fellow candidates as I'm sure they are encountering similar issues or problems and together we cannot fail. Be at the kwoon so much that I will be called a piece of furniture. Just hang me up beside the loins. I have confidence and firmly believe I will complete what I set out to do because I believe in myself and I believe in all that has brought me here. I have learned alot this year so far about myself and my limitations, my vulnerabilities, and what I am capable of doing. I just don't understand sometimes why I hold this restraint to just let things go and do it. What am I waiting for and what part of it all disallows me to nurture and feed the internal passion of my Kung Fu. What am I protecting and from what? I don't know it's all weird s#$t but hopefully I can come to an understanding and moments of clarity as I proceed down the path.

So I guess after all that craziness I just spilled and questions that come to mind, the ultimate path forward is to just go for it and stay in the moment day to day. I have completed a ton of things which has left me nothing but time for the next few months, so let's crank it up to 11! See you at the Kwoon.

Mack Truck vs. Black Belt

A lesson in Sihing class a few weeks ago has made a strong impact on my approach towards techniques, forms, and the last half of the six harmonies. I am nowhere near a solid understanding of it all but I feel I am heading in the right direction.

Sifu Brinker was teaching the class and we were working with the Triangle Stepping pattern. There was an explanation provided through comparative examples. This example was as follows; "If you are feeling like you have just been hit by a Mack truck, the application is misunderstood, if you don't feel anything and find yourself on the ground, that is the skill of a Black Belt" Sifu also touched on the second half of the six harmonies, the trajectory of energies, (which was the other direction to how it was percieved to me), grounded full circle power energy, and of course flow. The lower half of the body should be more of a focus than just simply charging ahead linear trying to go through your opponent, instead it begins with a simple deflection. A softening blow and wedging the opponent grounds you as the defender and completely disrupts your attackers six harmonies, increasing your options and their vulnerbilities. I also took away that rather than slamming them down and trying to imbed them into the floor, you are actually pulling them around. Really cool stuff that helped me a lot on how I should be applying all techniques.

Once this all started to come together and make sense, I learned a little more about the six harmoinies and how my energy would be far more effective and efficiant by changing my perspective and approach. I tend to practice my techniques more head on or linear with the intention of completely smashing and embedding my attacker into things. Sometimes yes this does work and can be highly effective, but I do understand now how vulnerable this leaves me and by applying that much strength incorrectly, someone that knows what they are doing, could probably take me out with my own energy, and very little of their own. This in turn would inflict some serious damage and remove my abilty to counter. I don't dig this at all. So this is where the inpiration and excitement came into play. It inspires me to be a much better martial artist and remove the vulnerbilty. There is the excititment of improving and applying your energies to be extremely powerful, yet smooth and in control of your sixharmonie. Really cool stuff.

 So I have been attempting to apply this knowledge to all my training. Not an easy task as I am quite grounded and content in catapillar mode, but I think now with the right trajectory and better comphrehension, and a whole pile of training, I can go into Black Belt mode.

Where to Start

This last while has been very difficult in moving forward. Situations, experiences, distractions and old habits awaken that can lead to frustration and in some cases personal reflection that can lead you off the path from by consulting the wrong perspective. Keeping track of the destination and believing in yourself and your Kung Fu will get you through, but that in itself is not always easy. Good thing I haven't lost touch of this and what it all means.
Let's start with a situation that happened a few days before we were to be leaving for B.C. via my Fathers farm in southern Alberta. First I get a call from a RCMP officer about an hour away telling me they have the license plate from my trailer. Oh that's just awesome! Go get my plate, stop by the house and grab the truck. Pull into the R.V storage place and our trailer is gone. Double awesome! Let the attendant know what has happened, so he reviews the security cameras. Get a call, yah we think we have your trailer on surveillance. Go to verify and confirm. Sure enough, here's these two losers rolling out of the facility with the trailer in tow, huge downward slant, wheel covers still on, and the safety chains dragging away in the gravel. Pretty much the epitome of ultimate fail. Call the wife and break the news, not cool. After my anger subsided I put it into the right perspective. It's a material item, they make them everyday and this was a lesson to insure the proper security measures. Crime is spiking hard these days and we must adapt to this. As I said, they make stuff everyday, but the hardest thing to let go of is the fantastic memories and the adventures my family and I had experienced. So we planned an alternative vacation and made the best of it. That's all you can do. I had a great visit with my family and some fantastic conversation and bonding time with my father. That means more than anything to me. My Dad is awesome.

Next issue, another new job, another aggressive schedule. I start tomorrow and work straight through the weekend with the exception of Sunday. Typically when you start a new job, rolling up the first day on site and saying I can't work this Saturday, an overtime day, is frowned upon and can sometimes make your duration shorter than originally anticipated or thought. I don't really know the people managing the job so that makes it much more difficult. So, now I am very pissed off again because I will have to miss boot camp. Boot camp is one of my most favourite events that the school provides. I always leave with an unexplained buzz, a wealth of new knowledge, a fitness level assessment, and an extreme sense of being grateful for all the time and effort involved from our black belts and special guests that make the day remarkable. Yah this really sucks hard and can dampen your spirits, not to mention this is another important step in your training. If you have never been to a boot camp or think its unimportant, think again. it's an instrumental step and a huge advancement to your Kung Fu. So if you can be there, be there.

So my training in general the last while has faltered somewhat and a complete scrambled mess. These have been dangerous waters for me to tread in. That is what completely decimated and thrown me off course on previous attempts. However this time things are different. My attitude towards it all has changed. I'm keeping it all in front of me and finding ways to adapt with the right focus and approach. Instead of putting a self imposed standard that exists no where but inside my thoughts and putting unsustainable training regiments in place with very difficult time lines, I am moving forward on a day to day basis and keeping the distant goal in the future and using this approach to succeed. November is coming fast and I will be ready. No matter what approach I have to take to make it work and move my Kung Fu forward. That is what's going to happen and that's what will happen.
Yes I am struggling a bit, but that is all part of it. That is what defines the individual and makes the journey concrete. I am in no way going to let another year pass and just write it off as oh well next year will be different. There is no next year, there is only this year and people are depending on me to get the job done. I have a great group of candidates to train with and I hold each of them in a very high area of respect. To me I let down my fellow candidates last year and that left a sting. I'm not going to do that to these guys or my teachers. I'm not going to let myself down or my girls that have offered endless support. I don't want to be one of those people that say, I used to be a martial artist, because if you do, you never were.

Chaos is Normal

The last few weeks have been crazy for me as all my regular routines have been tossed into a box and dropped down a well. It's nothing new though except one thing, my approach. Things really went south a few weeks ago when my latest project which was supposed to be 5-10's, turned into 7 days a week and 10 hours plus. Earlier start times and throw a 1 hour 20 min drive one way into the equation, leaves very little time to get in some quality training. What about those short days, well that would be perfect to get to the kwoon but there's one problem. A major vehicle repair that has too be completed before this up and coming weekend as it is a major component to towing our trailer as our annual camping trip is coming fast. Now normally I would be beating the crap out of myself and questioning my grit. Labeling myself as a failure and convincing myself that I am no black belt. Once I have beat myself and my integrity to a pulp, I will move onto to anger and question the whole process and write it off as it is stupid and the expectations are pointless as nobody has time to do this if your busy. Shortly after that, I feel like an idiot for throwing my Kung Fu away and try to start over, only ending up at the beginning of the same circle, ending with the same crappy attitude.

That was then, this is now. I know for a fact I have what it takes and then some. Where I have been and how I got here speaks volumes as I look back. The process does work and it works well if you embrace it and keep it close. You have to remind yourself that no matter what happens or how messed up things can become, your Kung Fu is there and it can be applied at anytime or anywhere. The reason I say this is I have been down this road before in my training and in my life and seemed to make it this far. I haven't stopped training at all, I haven't stopped keeping my goals in front of me, and my attitude remains open and adaptable. There is plenty of stuff that can be done in a day. I may not be able to get what I want done, but what is getting done is mindful and I respect and enjoy every chance I can get to train. I have made some great discoveries and have plenty of opportunities to apply them. I have learned through my mistakes and have used them as tools. I have observed and applied changes to my approach from watching and listening to others. As I have mentioned before, I am really enjoying this year and come November, I will leave the kwoon as a Black Belt and damn proud because this time, I got over myself and remember quite clearly what I am. That's just the way it's going to have to be. My life life is not going to change to suit my training, my training is going to have to learn to adjust to the chaos, it's that simple. Chaos is my norm and with Kung Fu a part of it, there is no fail, only endless opportunity. See you at the kwoon.

On The Road to Black Belt

It's a long haul to becoming a Black Belt in a traditional school. You can't buy it. You can't just wing it through, and you can't brown nose your way to the top. Blood, sweat, and tears will get you through indeed. But that's not even close to the tools you need. Compassion and awareness for yourself and others is one of the primary necessities that branches off into a full arsenal of what you need to bring to the table. Compassion for yourself to accept and embrace your failures. Awareness to comprehend the ripple effect you can and may have on others. It seems the more lethal you become, the more peaceful you become. Determination and discipline are there as well. Discipline to do and continue to do your homework and maintain the standard and uphold it to the level it was given to you and what you may eventually pass to those behind you. Determination to succeed and perfect in every aspect of your struggles and goals in all areas of your style or discipline. It's not easy, because if it was there would be Black Belts walking all over the place. There's not though and that's a good thing. Inspirational mentors that lead through example and if you are fortunate enough to learn from and be held accountable by, you have discovered the path. The rest is on you.

All of that being said, I can tell you through experience and personal perspective, attempting to reach Black Belt for me has been a long road. Many times I have chosen to take the long road because of those qualities I have mentioned above were lacking, non existant, or were just simply tossed as far as I could throw them. I thought a few times that I may just end up being a career Sihing. To hell with this. But, no matter how far I ventured off, no matter how deep I isolated myself, no matter how resentful and arrogant I became about all of these requirments, no matter how many public fails and deep disappointment in myself rose to anger... I continue to come back. I could always see the light in the distant some where. I always ended up searching through the long grass of regret and descending the deep valleys walls of resentement, or diving deep into the sess pool of pride, to get my tools back and polish them back to the lustre of a martial artist on the road to the level of Black Belt.

I feel really good about this year as my perspective and path forward has changed in a big way. I accept my fails and embrace those that have influenced me. I feel like I am so far behind in some areas, but so far advanced in others that it blows my mind and leaves me vapour locked. I look forward to making my teachers and fellow students that have shared so much of their skill and time with me very proud. I look forward to the day when I can wipe the dirt off my face and say, Yup, I am a part of the linage and legacy of our school. I am a Black Belt....Yah, I like that and I hope those of you on your own journey can too. See you at the Kwoon.

Canada Day 2016

This year's Canada Day was pretty cool.  I have never been involved in a demo to this magnitude and variety.  The lion, dragon, all the weapons and hand forms, and for good measure, 1000 push up and sit ups. It was a really good day and I enjoyed seeing the members of this team display their skill and challenge their comfort zones by just jumping in on the dragon,  even if they had no idea.  Publicly. That really reflects to me just how connected this team is as everyone seems to find comfort regardless of environment.  That is really awesome.

Another area I thought really showed the skill level of this team was to pull a 10 second piece out of your form.  Some of our members had no idea that was coming,  but they went behind the tent, created a piece,  and performed publicly.  That is skill to surpass a challenge like that and succeed.

Now I have to talk about my public board break. My first attempt was by far the most embarrassing board break I have ever done.  I felt that I not only embarrassed myself, but the team as well. I mean let's face it for what it was...bad. Way too much in a hurry and not calming my mind properly. There were mixed emotions at the time to deal with when I was given a second attempt and while performing it. Seeing the first board fly into Sifus face like a bullet concerned me,  then it was oh yeah I'm  in the middle of a board break here! I'm really thankful that the rest broke.

Fortunately I was also given footage of the break,  (thank you Sihing, your awesome)  which gave me some analytical insight to work with.  First board,  I jammed that kick by being too close to the target,  but on a positive note the power was straight out.  The second and third boards,  there is no footwork involved and just straight up blunt force trauma,  I switched into caterpillar D9 mode. There's no grounded technique here.  The fourth and final board was a really wild experience though. I thought I missed the board completely. I didn't feel nothing except very light contact on my heel.  It was as if I just extended the leg and lightly touched the board with my heel.  I don't really remember much going into the fourth break either,  but I was sure happy to see Mr.  Duncan holding a piece of the board.

So a lot of good stuff to work with here.  I have to do a successful public board break before I earn a black belt. I can't leave this behind as incomplete as I will never feel right about it knowing that the majority of my public breaks were fails.  One last note,  I just want to say thanks to the team for a wonderful day and a big thanks to all the guy's that held the  boards for me. Sorry about the board to the face, but I put that on Sifu R Langner! See you at the kwoon.

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Vulnerbilities

In one way or another, each and everyone of us has a weak link or soft spot in our armour. Many claim to carry a coat of armour that is impenetrable, but I honestly believe that leans more to desensitization or denial to face your shortcomings. They are more scared than anything about how others see them, but yet boast of rootless and hollow life knowledge. I have no time for these types. I do however have all the time in the world and hold high admiration to those that expose the inner challenges and choose to face them head on. That takes courage  and also displays strong character and massive inner confidence. A seed that just simply needs to be planted and nurished, that through dedication and tolerance to themselves will grow into a 300 ft. redwood. I also learn a valuable lesson, as we all should,  from those who hold admittance and practice with discipline, tools that have been provided to them through consultation of experience and respect to that source. I honestly believe practicing martial arts with respect and passion will solidify any vulnerbilities and turn it into something extrodinary instead of a vulnerbility.

Move like a Cat

I was just thinking how I move like a cat, a caterpillar D9 that is. That's pretty much how I view myself during my amateur hour attempt at Tai Chi and many other aspects of my Kung Fu. It's not always this graceful though! I'm just glad Sifu Dennis or Sifu Vantuil hasn't had to view this slaughter of a fine art.

Every since last years boot camp when I was introduced to a number of internal Kung Fu training such as walking meditation, Tai Chi, and something I was never exposed too, Nygong,(spelling?) I was hooked, But I was intrigued and some what surprised at the feelings and results of that day. The internal power and burning sensation of actually feeling Chi to that level was something that was amazing and I hope by years end I can dispatch and utilize my Chi as necessary and into more aspects of my Kung Fu. I have felt it since but not to that level.... yet.

I feel I am getting closer though as it has come around more often the last while during form reps and during my caterpillar D9 Tai Chi. Some days I really connect with it while doing clouded hands?? The physical part of the six harmonies are in check, when my hands start to tingle and my weight transfers are feeling perfect, it's something I can't really describe but I do know this much, I feel light as a feather, but have the power to pick up a truck and throw it. I really enjoy the intensity of my mind at this time. I am relaxed but extremely focused. I am in touch with every sound, every movement around me and am ready to react if I had to, but not in a tense way, when I'm there I could shatter a bolder if it was thrown at me, but my mind wouldn't flinch, back to calm. Overall it's pretty damn cool. Other times I look like I am having a seizure and there is absolutely no connection to anything, and nothing is working in unison. Oh well, all on the quest for mastery and the depths of old school Kung Fu. See you at the Kwoon.

Somethings Not Right

Let's start with the doctor stuff. Turns out the last while the meds I have been prescribed are having zero effect and so that means my thyroid is doing nothing but hanging out having a nap. That would explain a number of things that have been going very wrong. I have had to really push myself to keep moving forward. When I feel like this, I push anyway, but when I stop I could easily fall asleep while standing. Apparently this is bad. Bad as in long term health problems and very serious repercussions. I had serious brain fog happening and although I had all the intention to do all kinds of things, less than half of that actually happened. Tired, bad bad attitude, and a very short tolerance for others around me. I never really lashed out at anyone as I managed to keep my cool, but there were times when I could have easily been a reasonable facsimile to a flame thrower or a wrecking ball on steroids. Not cool and not like me at all. Training was very hard as my focus was next to impossible to direct. Figuring out or moving forward on situations that I could easily do in my sleep just wasn't happening. I noticed I had to push very hard during my physical training, harder than usual.  I thought, what the hells going on here? I can't do anything, I can't think. Losing my appetite.... has the condition gotten worse... wait... losing my appetite.... better go see the man in the long white coat. Well after a long conversation and some enquires, the conclusion was, your meds are not working and from what your telling me, they haven't been working for sometime now. Oh that's awesome. So I'm on different ones and although it's only been a few days, I can feel a slight change every day. This is a good thing, so more tests down the road and hopefully I'll find the correct dosage and become balanced once again.
 With July around the corner I am going to be doing some gradual but drastic change ups in my diet and consumption. I'm going to experiment with what goes into my body and what will no longer. I don't believe a lot of what I read or follow the latest trend "experts". I'm the type of person that needs to see and feel it for myself because we are all different and as are the effects. I see this situation as a serious wake up call. People count on me, I want to see and get more out of my life, that will be very difficult with a terrible disease or worse yet I die. Action is now and ill fated intention is bulls#$t. I'll keep you all posted and many blogs to come as there is quite a bit more to my story as of late. See you at the Kwoon.

An Overview Overdue

So I had some issues in regards to my electronics the last while that has prevented me from getting my blogs out. This is no excuse however as I did have plenty of time to post before these problems rose to frustration. I do have a ton of patience but not enough to try to finish or write a blog with my fat fingers and tiny phone screen. Sorry for the MIA. Rather than try to post a bunch of blogs at once, I'll post one with a little piece of each one.

Weapon training is something I truly enjoy. As much as I like to put my self in a virtual battle in my mind, hacking up bad guys and what have you, I also really enjoy the technical side of it. Training with a weapon of any sort can expose your stance weaknesses, challenge your timing, and really help creativity from your mind and then try to translate it through your body, way cool and way too much fun. One thing about building your own weapon form though, you have to keep in mind, it's just like any other form. When it starts to evolve, the flow and transitions change. Areas of your form will become more stable and faster that may not coincide with the others. So much is effected but unfortunately, not necessarily at the same time. This can create frustration and doubt, but the important part is to not venture too far off of your original vision and just tweek the form a little at a time instead of massive changes. I tend to learn this the hard way. I had a pretty good Twin Axe form going and was doing a few reps a day. I knew our first demo was coming and I assured myself and others it would be demo ready. Well, I ended up getting side tracked and my daily weapon form reps went to the way side. A few days before the demo, I was doing my form and thought, "I really don't like this part, I have a few days, so I'll change it" and began to change a bunch of stuff shortly before the demo. This was a really dumb move as I had a bunch of muscle memory trained into my mind a body and thought I could re program myself and my movements, nope. As a result my form really sucked and the last 1/3 was on auto pilot as I had no clue or idea what I was doing, thank goodness I remembered the finish. So this was a good reminder as to why all aspects of our training must move together in an incremental fashion and if your going to change things, do so way ahead of the due date.

I have had a true misconception of the first part of the six harmonies, as I felt they should be moving all at once from last technique completion, through transition, to next technique execution. The problem here is that yes they move together, but not how I was applying them. I was missing the steps, technique, return to center, settle into the stance, apply technique timed with a good solid grounding. I was trying to do this all at once, but skipping a lot of these important steps, which makes the whole system useless. There is no solidification or centering involved this way or power/grounding in the techniques.This might not make sense, but long story short, I have been doing this form sometime and it is taking a lot of work to break the habit. Oh well, all on the quest for mastery indeed.

All or nothing reared it's ugly head on me again. This problem has been much to my demise many a time. It's a tough balance sometimes to separate your work or occupational mindset form your Kung Fu work ethic. I have trouble with this at times. If there is a problem or task that needs to be tended to then it's all or nothing until the issue is solved meanwhile other things go to the way side and then the cycle begins, which ends up turning into a big pile of tangled mess frustration and you just want to say to hell with all of this. This wastes time and removes your full control of what you need to do or take care of in a very unproductive and unhealthy way as it festers to negativity and bad choices as to what you need in your life and what you don't. I have changed my approach this year to the mindset that incremental progress is key, period. I was trying to fix a few trouble areas in my Kung Fu and as a result, that's where all my focus went and I paid for it buy not practicing other areas, all or nothing came into play and then I looked back and realized what other areas were being left behind. This isn't healthy, productive, or efficient training. I stopped, reviewed my requirements and goals and now I am proceeding in a much more stable and productive fashion. It's not easy to stay away from this mindset for me, at work and other areas it's go until your done, less important things can wait. This doesn't work in Kung Fu or other areas and I hope by the time the year is over, I can learn to stay on the incremental focus and practice a healthier approach.

I had the opportunity to get in some sparring last week during the que belt classes. I haven't sparred since the last san shou class, which is way too long of a stretch. I really enjoy sparring and almost forgot just how valuable of a tool it is. I hope we'll see the return of san shou someday but in the meantime I am going to try to get to open training as I understand there is a group that spars there every week. Good stuff indeed.

Sorry for the long post and scattered theme, but I had to let you know what's been up for the last while. I am currently on a 12 hour nighshift schedule for a few more days and then I am flying out to the west coast for a few days, but I will be back next week. I hope everyones training is going well. See you at the Kwoon.

Another Tool

A lot has been said the past while about our annual fundraiser Pandamonium. There was mention of awareness, question of full understanding, and what exactly does it mean to you? There are several definitions to this as individual perception based upon beliefs and actions vary. It is a lot more than raising money, although money is necessary to continue to do what we do, it is in all actuality another tool. A tool that is of traditional training. I could be wrong but I believe your internal Kung Fu needs to be just as strong as your external with sound and grounded technique. If you some day want to experience the void, the ultimate balance that holds no segregation; then this opportunity is a required component of the intricate make up of a true martial artist.

The heart of the whole thing is to make you a better and more balanced martial artist and person. To inspire and drive you to become one with the earth and all that inhabits it and enhance your connection to it through yourself shared to others. By being compassionate and willing to make change, your internal Kung Fu will grow.

If you want to make change, but don't know how or your uncomfortable in a social position, use this tool to train yourself to start a personal journey of compassion and empathy. This type of Kung Fu training gives you the opportunity to believe in yourself and exploit your beliefs with courage and confidence, with heart. Your educating yourself and others about compassion and empathy, and practicing the process of internal training.  I am a firm believer in just being your self and don't be scared to question or stand up for what you believe in. Let people know how you feel and why. If you struggle with any of these areas or feel the need to educate and improve not only your own compassion and empathy, but others as well, this is a valuable tool in your arsenal. The best part is you can do it at your own pace and how you want to do it because this is all part of your journey and your individual Kung Fu, It's all on you because it comes from your mind and heart. If you see the point I am trying to make you will see that this is what you need to be a balanced martial artist. It's very easy to just walk up to someone and punch or kick them to get your point across, but it's another to get your point across through knowledge and a solid display of character that leaves a more prominent impact that intices and spreads empathy and compassion through others.

I struggled alot with Panadamonium this year. It's not that I don't care or having problems approaching others is an issue. I believe in our charities and have no problem supporting them through public acknowledgement. I just couldn't bring myself to ask people for money when so much has been going on in our own province. 80,000 people plus out of work, 120,000 people displaced because of natural disaster, and being exposed to the homeless and social issues walking to and from work for the last 6 months downtown, really hit home. I know there is much more to it than that and think I made that point earlier. However as Sifu Brinker said our last meeting, Pandamonium is not just the day of, it is the year of Pandamonium 2016. I made a goal to raise a $1000 to go towards our charities and I intend to see it through. I just think this wasn't the time, but I still have 7 months to find the moment and run with it and strengthen my internal Kung Fu. See you at the kwoon.

Understanding the Mechanics

I've always been one that needs to know and understand the mechanics of just about everything I see or use in my day to day life. In my mind I open a window and unfold the subject into a huge schematic with multiple views to watch all involved work in unison to help me understand. I can turn just about anything into gears, linkages, drive pulleys...etc. What makes it work, how does it work, and why does it work the way it does? When things fail or malfunction, what part of the mechanism is causing this and what part needs to be replaced or modified in order to function properly? What part of this structure do I not understand and what source do I need to consult in order too? All of these questions and stand points have been applied to my training on and off through out the years. But as of recently I have advanced further into the understanding and discoveries of Kung Fu as I venture forth on my journey to the level of black belt. I am not just seeing it as knowing the forms or techniques, or just simply throwing the kick or punch. I am seeing the whole thing from where my brain sends the signal, to all action followed through to completion and it's effects. I guess you could say I'm advancing further into the depths of Kung Fu and it's mechanics and it's effectiveness. The last two Sihing classes I have attended was a huge wealth of knowledge and technical advancement towards my understanding and applications of training. Simple things with high results and the opening of a window in my mind has already changed my approach and has increased my ability to troubleshoot and improve several aspects of my Kung Fu.

The weekly challenges I have been doing are all part of a plan to tackle my trouble or weaker areas. Starting from the hardest or larger problematic issues to areas that just simply need polishing. For example the spinning back kick from a bow stance has been an area of frustration and one of my weaker areas. By focusing on the mechanics of this kick I have discovered why I am thrown off balance and struggle to remain stable. Rather than raising the chamber straight up to the chest to remain centered, I am swinging the chamber away from the body which in turn throws my balance out and the leg is already partially extended. This partial extension increases as I continue to spin, by the time I am in the correct position to release the chamber I am thrusting the kicking leg further than necessary throwing me further off balance. Another discovery which is effecting all my kicks is returning to the chambered position quicker with more control. As much work as I have put into this kick, it still needs much more. Through everything though the biggest issue I have noticed is failing to reclaim center through the execution is a big one for not only this kick in particular, but everything else as well. But that's another blog. See you at the Kwoon.

Efficiency

Efficiency is a practice that should be utilized in just about everything we do whether it's a mental or physical action. Proper diet and hydration is important for us to accomplish anything for that matter along with another huge factor we all seem to abuse, rest. Without proper eating habits, hydration, and rest, our bodies and minds become weak and sluggish; inefficient. So along with this thinking brings me to the conclusion I should attempt to become a vegetarian for a month or two once the Farmers Markets open up for business. Clean fuel needs to run through me in order to be a machine. As does water. To keep this in check one of my goals this year was to consume 1000 liters of water. Aside from this there is another component that is imperative to this complex machinery.  With the help of my wife, my blood will be tested at the end of the week to see exactly what I am allergic too and I can take action to help my body recover or at least relax my autoimmune system and it's attack. This is one of several areas that I am changing in order to reach machine level.

 Time moves quick and it seems we are always trying to find more in order to accomplish all the things we chose to take on to support our quest for knowledge and physical advancement. But it is also not just about time. It's about how we use our available time for max efficiency when we don't have an abundance at the current moment. I try to do a few exercises in one rep. Squats from a horse stance, while executing kicks. With this I am working on my horse stance, core, crane stance muscles, and proper engagement with the kick. I have been using some ankle weights with a few reps and in doing so, I try to hold the leg up for a few seconds at kick completion to build those little guys in the hips. That's just one of many I have been working towards modifying in order to make efficiency happen in my physical training.

As far as mental efficiency goes. it's amazing how much more fun running is when you have your memorization work or curriculum coming through your headphones, that is coming from your phone, that is tracking just about everything you need to know about your running. You can also blast music or pull the plugs and just take in nature. Stimulating the mind is imperative for overall efficiency as well. So there is another area that you can do and accomplish so much with one action. Efficient training and time management. So that's where things are at for now. See you at the Kwoon

One Step Forward.....

What a great way to start the long weekend by our monkey team completing our very first challenge with success. There was a lot of awesome stuff going on there that night and I look forward to see what I witnessed evolve even further throughout the year. Regardless of how you may feel about your performance, everyone was great. Especially considering this is only the rough version. Imagine how you are all going to look in another month. With this kind of skill and advancement this gives our team many more opportunities and drives the potency of the I Ho Chuan higher and higher. Good stuff indeed.
For my own form the final result was down to the wire because of illness. I'm happy with what I have for a base and once I get more of the footwork mastered and incorporate the kicks I decide on, I think it will be one of my better forms. Some of the techniques will have to more defined and complete stances, but at least now I have a form to start recording reps and move forward and continue to balance my training overall. I really like these weapons, too much fun.

I had a little of a mid month stall in my physical training because mother nature decided I needed a cleanse whether I wanted it or not. It's been sometime since I have been that sick or have ever had a stomach virus to that level. All I can say is that I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I am grateful for my health though, as there are others in my place of work that are still at home and are on potent antibiotics. I did go see a doctor though just in case and I'm glad I did because I knew there was more to all of this. I have become sick more often this year than I have over a lengthy period of time. Why is that? Because my Thyroid medicine is not working which is leaving it vulnerable to my autoimmune system attacking it. Not good. So between an increase in dosage and the direction of diet and different herbs and foods from the reflexologist I am seeing, things will improve I'm sure. The stupid part of it all though is my stubbornness to change. I was directed to change my diet for 30 days and reintroduce different food to find the allergen and help my body. Instead of doing this, I looked at it as sacrifice, that and I love all kinds of food. Well not all of it, I have grown to stay away from a bunch of things that I know are not good, but I am not overly picky. Getting back to the point, I thought I would take the easy way and just get a test done that will tell me exactly what it is. Long waiting list and trouble getting away from work was my excuse, meanwhile, I am becoming more and more susceptible to illness and permanent damage. Idiot. So the diet it is and hopefully I can find out what the problem is sooner than later.

I was progressing very well until all of this came about but that's the way it goes sometimes and the show must go on. While down I reviewed my progress and tweeked my plan because for a change, I am recording my training. Not 100% yet, but an honest approach is there. It's amazing how much progress you can lose in just a couple of weeks but I use it as inspiration to get caught up and exceed the previous month instead of dwelling about what was. Form advancement is coming along well and my side heel is getting better. More curriculum review has to come into play and I'm enjoying fitness advancements, weight training, and combinations. I plan to set some goals for the month of April and see what I can pull off. I almost have all my numbers tallied for March and will be posting them soon. That's about it for this week, happy training everyone. See you at the kwoon.

Slow, but Steady

Well so far things are not coming along as quickly as I would like but moving forward just the same. I have been working at several aspects of training but mostly forms, kicks, and our required version 1.0 that is due very soon.

My weapon form is moving along rather slowly at the moment. It always takes me a little while to create a form as the focus is on mainly the technique and familiarization of the weapon. The mechanics if you will. Then I work on incorporating the stance with said technique, moving into transitional flow. This all takes time as your center and grounding with the multitude of techniques available, will be altered. So choosing the the proper stance for whatever it is you are applying is paramount. I have a pretty good feeling about this weapon choice though as it is posing difficulty and that usually means the choice is solid.
I have chosen to do two weapon forms this year because I don't want to leave progress behind and I am hoping to use this as an enhancement towards my overall weapon training experience. I am continuing the Long Axe as I feel I have finally created a good solid base with that weapon and now I have something to work off of. That form was probably Version 9.4, but I feel it was worth the work. I am hoping by the end of the year I will have that form evolved even further and the "Twins of Death" right up there along side of it.
I have made some excellent progress in two forms I am currently working on. I struggled with hip engagement in Loa Gar for some time now, but after consulting a Sifu on the mechanics of the Loa Gar stance and being shown that it is more of a rotational power, I now have my hip engaging involuntary and I actually feel the power and flamboyance of the form and techniques/settling of the stance. This form is starting to flow very well and I'm starting to actually feel the energy. So this is a good thing. The other is Long. There are certain areas in that form where the stance transition into the next technique has been wobbly and the timing has been way off. Again, after consulting with a Sifu, a lot of it had to do with body mechanics and timing of the arms to begin and complete the transition and settle into the stance.

Aside from that the rest has been working on kicks upon kicks and all the maintenance that goes along with it. I have been working on squats to increase my power when throwing kicks from a horse stance and using ankle weights to increase my power to get the crane stance up higher as well as incorporating them into regular kick reps. This is going to require some attention because I am terribly guilty of not taking the time to stretch properly. I also haven't managed to get in as much Qi Gong as necessary. So these two things are some of my target zones for sure.

I have begun to see a reflexologist again on a regular basis and even after one session, I can see positive results physically and mentally. I have began to remove some things from my diet and feel good results from that as well. I plan to do some serious changes here and clean up the fuel my body needs.

I am also slowly making progress towards combo work and implementing weight training into my routines. I figure if I can get this all moving forward even if they are all at different levels of progression, it won't matter what life throws at me, I will always be moving forward and my ability to adapt to it all will become effortless effort, and that's just cool. See you at the kwoon.

Switching Directions

I gained at lot of opportunity these last few weeks in the form of assistance and knowledge, along with lot's of homework to get on top of if I wish to see my training and skillset become solid. Solid enough to where my training base for this year, and years to come, has opportunity for continuous improvement and longevity to the art. I sometimes feel all I have done is continuously circle the opportunity, but never feeling full confidence in the decision to take it. Situations of life was commonly used as an excuse not to move forward, but most of the time it was my stubbornness of not meeting the level I feel should be presentable at grading. A detrimental approach by holding the mentality that it is all or nothing. Long story short, I have obviously taken it upon myself to walk the longest path in order to move forward and succeed in overcoming a giant block I have thrown in my own path. I feel that now is the time to smash that block and leave the worn out path behind. So that's what I will do.

I had the opportunity last I Ho Chuan class to finally pull out the twin battle axes and see just what they could do and how I was going to make them do it. I think I am really going to enjoy these, I feel like I could smash a building down with them. But they are going to require some adaptability because they are short twin weapons and they are heavier than any other twin weapon I have trained with previous. So I researched the "Twins of Death" in order to find out what I could about them and discovered some valuable information. I read an article loaded with techniques, single and double offense, and common stances that have been used for sometime. What I didn't see much of though was blocking techniques, so I will have to make my own and utilize some of the advice I was given at class. I'm really looking forward to building a form with this weapon choice.

Other than that I am working on improving my daily discipline and have a lot of homework to do in all aspects of my Kung Fu. This last while I have spent at the kwoon has been awesome. We have covered some really good basics which in turn helps me focused on my training. There's more to this but that's another blog. See you at the kwoon.

One Cool Night

That way cool banquet lastnight was an incredible showing of where hard work, discipline, and adaptabilty can take you. Each candidate , with unique situations and outcomes, still forged ahead and represented determination right up to being promoted to Black Belt. I can honestly say I feel privilaged to have trained with each of you at some point, you guy's are awesome. Congratulations as well to our Black Belts promoted and our Sifus' and students being recognized for hard work and dedication to they're training and others.

Seeing and hearing our charity representatives and what we are able to do as a school instills pride for sure. It reminds you of where we come from, but also what it takes to create the opprotunity. A student body showing awarenes and earning support for others in need is a very solid example of true Martial artists.

The lion dance and dragon dance was incredible. You guys looked amazing and performed flawlessly. Nice work. Given the opportunity to be in a lion was a fun and a proud part of the evening, seeing little feet run beside you and guessing where our   next move is always keeps it fun. I felt very privilaged and proud to be of the I Ho Chuan team and it's demonstration a well. Seeing everyone from where  they stratde to where they ended for the year cannot be desribed but simply held with admiration and respect. You guy's looked great and displayed your skill to make a great demo, way cool.

The whole experience was incredible from the time we set up to the time we hung the last lion on the wall. The whole day was a calm atmoshere, I think the calmest I have ever seen anyone for that matter on a Chinese New Year Banquet. It rolled and moved along like a well oiled machine. It was also the one of those rare times when I was about do my weapon form and I was calm. The weirdest part though is where I went after the first block, I went into a battle zone and the only person there briefly was me, one of those very cool moments for sure.

It was good to see and talk to others I haven't seen in a while and to just be part of the whole thing. Bringing a close to the year of the sheep is filled with excitiement because  now we begin another year. I think the year of the monkey is going to be another great year training with awesome people and doing extrodinary things. Thanks again to the team and all of those involved that made the night spectacular.

One last note, I'm glad that a tragedy never occurred for a senesless and shameful act, I hope all is well.